I dislike conflict.
I avoid drama.
Historically, my goal has been to keep everyone as happy as possible in order to maintain harmony.
I used to be called “Switzerland” by my friends because I was so good at staying neutral.
What does “neutral” really mean?
Sure, it sounds all lovey and peaceful…
But reflecting upon my younger self, I now realize that I was pretty much just a big chicken who feared reprisals.
I would often hold my tongue in order to keep the peace, but at the expense of my own.
I thought that I was letting things wash over me and that this was somehow better than getting into “it” — whatever “it” was in the moment.
I would suppress opinions, but let others have theirs.
I thought it was more spiritual to let things go.
There is a perception that to be spiritual means to forgive everything and to have compassion for everyone.
This is true… in a certain context.
I believe that in our sacred relationship to The All, be it when we meditate, when we pray, when we commune, when we transcend… just us mixed with bliss and The All…
It is here that we heal, forgive, understand, then dig deeper, hold ourselves accountable, wake up further, and hold love in our hearts for everyone…
Including the chaos-makers (who seem to be rampantly proliferating).
However in our daily lives I now see that being spiritually neutral is not the way to go.
Of course we need to be mindful, love-centered, and consciously pick our battles.
But one of the most spiritual actions we can take is to call out the chaos-makers and keep them out.
Because boundaries are power and they show the chaos-makers that we will not be stepped on.
Our love will not be twisted up to suit their own ends.
Our light will not be extruded to fuel their darkness.
In a year of surprise endings (The Election! The Superbowl! The Oscars!), the lesson is that outcomes are no longer obvious, but complacency and fence-sitting are not options.
We are being challenged to fully figure out how far into the light we want to stand.
I now know that being kind and neutral are not synonymous.
I am nice, but do not mistake that for weakness.
I am loving, but will I not tolerate cruelty in all of its disguises.
I am compassionate, but I am not a pushover.
Forgiveness is earned, not automatic.
Until we declare our positions, energetic looting will continue.
Because they will not change until we do.
In the bigger picture, these fortifications push the chaos-makers closer toward their own healing (be it in this lifetime or the next), so above all, it’s an act of love.
There is a line floating around the internet (If anyone knows who said it first, I’d love to know): “Do no harm, but take no sh*t.”
I feel this is where we need to be now in order to neutralize chaos.
It’s certainly where I am.
No longer neutral, but neutralizing.